So I think I'm going to be ending this year on a kind of depressing note, blogging wise. As the title would suggest, I've been feeling a bit connected from blogging, from reading, from the blogosphere lately. It's only until now that I realised that that was the way I was feeling. I thought I'd just been in a bit of a slump as per usual, but it's been going on for what feels like forever now and I just wanted to address that properly.
It comforting to have been able to read so many posts of late about this sort of thing, because it's nice in a way to realise that even the most talented, wonderful bloggers out there have slumps like everyone else. I'm not going to give up blogging or anything, in case you're wondering. That's not the way to go about fixing this problem, I don't think. Well, personally, for me anyway.
I just feel like for the past year at least that I have come to a complete standstill with blogging. I love it and I mostly do it for me, but at the same time I want to feel like I am contributing something new or interesting or different to the community that I belong to. I see all of these bloggers who are just so great at what they do and who have so many ideas and so many plans and are so organised and have such initiative, and it's like what do I give? What do I provide as a blogger? My opinion on books, which is what I set out to do, but that's it! I literally pretty much only do review posts these days. I mean, I never really had any ideas for features or the like in the first place, but I feel like I am not producing the sort of quality content, the variety of content, that I should? For some reason I just feel like I've put a lot of pressure on myself to be better and I lack the motivation and the creativity to do so. I love the followers and readers that I have dearly, and I wouldn't have gotten this far without them, and I know that it's not about the views and the follower counts, but I still just feel like I have come to a complete standstill and like I have nothing to give.
I've also felt so disconnected from what I've been reading lately. I was thinking about this when I was writing up my top ten books of the year, and I realised that compared to last year, it didn't really feel like much stood out to me. I still like the books that I read but they don't spark things in me like they used to. There are very few books which I read this past year which made me feel and made me feel better and just evoked something in me, something that made it truly special and personal, you know? And I still think reading is fun. I don't think you could force me to give up reading now if you tried. I just want to get back in my groove, finding a happy medium between reading loads of books and not really getting anything out of them and reading hardly any books at all but adoring them. Maybe it's just been a bad year for me reading/blogging wise. I don't know.
I just feel at a bit of a loss with this whole thing, you know?
Yeah. Well, I really hope that 2014 is the year that I get back on my feet with this whole thing. I feel a bit better now getting all that off of my chest.